Yes you heard it right folks.
It is a fact that today if there was no bitterness, stigma, dogma, taboo and money attached to a separation..there would be many more divorces.People have shied away from separating from their spouses simply because it is just too much of an effort to do so…over and above the social angle attached to it.It s not true love that keeps them together..
some people chose to ignore this and bracket it under ‘compromise’ and live out their boring meaningless lives, bickering and fighting and cribbing…and in more cases than not- having an extra-marital affair.Some people just get bored.They fall out of love because of over familiarity – and please before you women jump – it is as applicable to men as it is to women.Boredom creeps into the sex lives, behaviors patterns..and this compounds the matters.It becomes an obstacle to a free flowing relationship.
What will this do -?
- break age old beliefs that tie people down without willingness to do so.
- people get real about their wants and needs – instead of always being in a hypothetical mindset.
- less crimes against women.
- modernize our society.
It would be unfair to say all people go through this..because some smartly work it out – reinventing things.But for majority ,it does not.Even re-inventing your sex life is against some social & religious practices as well.Ignorance and misinformation play a huge role as well.
Chauvinistic ‘peerhood’ also is a big cause for concern between men, and conservatism in women.Each of these type of men and women have a very strong belief system.They think what they know is right.Period. they form opinions about life which may not be logical or even justified…but hey they will surely make sure that they make it sound as if it is the best decision or the best thing to do.Rest follow.
The object of marriage is to co-exist willingly,in love,and respect.If any of these things go missing..then it starts to test the individual.
So think about a situation where you could be married only for 5 years.
At the end of the 5 year contract, you re free to go anywhere you want to anyone you want. You just become available again in the market.You are allowed to find a new partner or separate with existing one without any bitterness, fights, or even a divorce. Alternatively, if the last 5 years have been so fulfilling then you can always renew the contract.Keep renewing it till you want.There will be no taboo or social stigma attached to it.
If you chose to have kids within the 5 year period then full financial responsibility is needed to be borne by both partners till the child completes his basic college education.Similarly, any other joint financial decisions/investments need to be separated equally.
What will this do ?
- Reduce time energy and money and emotional breakdowns, running to fro the courts.
- People will learn to recognize their true feelings and take actions accordingly.
- People will be more careful before planning a child…not bow to family or peer pressure to have a kid.
- life will be more practical than farcical.
What’s the risk – The trouble starts when the husband has invested a lot of money and wife has not or the reverse.In that case only one partner is financially independent and the other is not.So therefore the dependent one will always want to renew the contract while the independent one might not want to do the same.What happens then ?
The answer is simple – whoever initiates the close of a contract pays the other party. If they jointly decide no payment is required then that is fine.If there is a dispute on how much money should be given – an independent financial health counselor should evaluate their financial standing and the separated partners scope of leading a par living, and compute the amount needed to sustain a similar lifestyle for a the period of time in between the next contract.The payment seizes once the dependent partner is into a new contract.
What will this do –
- prevent abuses physical and mental,coz if one of the partner is in a bad condition – then the other has to pay during contract period.
- no party will be left out in the lurch fighting lengthy court battles.
- increase awareness between two prospective contractors
- more people will try tp make sure they are financially independent.
- greater care about breaking off a relationship
Is this system fool proof ? no it is not – every system has it s breaking points or loop holes – there will be exceptional cases which probably do not fall under any such categorization and will have to be dealt separately – aren’t we doing that now as well in our current system? This system will minimize the impact of mis utilization of the word marriage.it will enhance true love and reason to back it.It will make people more practical and true to their innermost feelings and thoughts,and improve as a society.
Go ahead take a quick poll – anonymously – and let us know your true thoughts.
- the views are objective and for a discussion point only.
- the views expressed do not mean disrespect to any section of the society.
- the views expressed are not to be mixed with authors personal life.
- the views expressed are not meant to discriminate existing systems.